"I don't like your style, Mommy. Take the black pants off. Wear the white ones instead."
"I'm not cute. I'm not beautiful. I'm something else."
"Pinky is my baby sister. I will help you, Pinky. I show you how to do things. I help you, I'm a good big sister for you." "Where does Pinky live?" "In my tummy." "When will she get born?" "Not for a loooooooooong time...Next week!"
So besides dictating fashion choices for the whole family ("wear the bluebiderry shirt, Daddy"), denying her attractiveness, and inventing imaginy siblings, Lauren's also been busy attempting to run away from home. She packed her Elmo suitcase with her toothbrush, a wooden toy hamburger bun, two juiceboxes and a soccer ball, and attempted to leave. Conversation went more or less as follows:
"Mama, open the door. I'm going to Alpine."
"Oh, how are you going to get there?"
We also have a similar conversation on video, since she repeated the attempt the next day as well.
Halloween was fun around here, even though Lauren would not wear any of her 4 costumes (that would be the princess ensemble she insisted on weeks ago, the ladybug suit my mom got, or the giraffe and beagle costumes from last year). She did condescend to wear an orange shirt in the evening (with red pants, in typical Lauren style). We never get trick or treaters unless we invite them, so the Maucks (minus the ladies) and the Velezes came over and some neighbors darted in and out. We were left with 4 pounds of candy, plus our next-door-neighbors gave us their stash in case anyone came later (they're new, they don't realize no one comes to townhouses in condo-apartmentland where we live, even though we have our own spookily decorated front doors). Today we gave all of it to Angelo next door, who is 13 and too old to go trick or treating with his little brother.
Last year, Lauren was still subsisting mostly on baby food and the confections of the season were lost on her. This year, you could definitely say she is AWARE of candy. And how to move chairs over and climb on them as ladders and reach and grab a handful of M&Ms and then shriek around the house delightedly, leaving little chocolate handprints on the walls and once-white carpet.
We were all sick last week with a cough which was no fun because Lauren had to miss school, which meant I missed work. I am on antibiotics which I am enternally grateful for and so glad I live in the 20th century where strep throat goes poof after a few days on amoxycillin. Lauren somehow did not get step, but we all have bronchitis as well. The family that coughs together, stays together!
Cheater Smoked Trout
1 week ago